Enough - EP

by Mandy Pennington

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about

An imperfect but authentic piece of my heart.

"Pain is real and deserves to be felt.
There are many worse ways for its manifestation,
so here are these songs, a dedication
of sorts
to the one who worries that she's not enough."

credits

released January 29, 2017

​It was important to me to do this project on my own, because it felt so close to my heart that I didn't want anyone else to touch it (as crazy as that sounds). Therefore, imperfect as it is, I'm proud of it as my first independent project and am glad to be able to share these intimate songs with you.

Written, performed, recorded, produced independently at Greenville College studios.

tags

license

all rights reserved

about

Mandy Pennington Greenville, Illinois

Aspiring singer/songwriter who currently attends Greenville College. My dream is to move to Nashville and become a recording artist.
I love coffee, chocolate, Sara Bareilles, Ingrid Michaelson, Harry Potter, art, beautiful lyrics, sad movies, good friends, and authenticity.

Check out my current project, A.M.:
am-pop-music.bandcamp.com
... more

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Track Name: Blustery Winds
Leaning far over the edge
I'm a fool to even let this begin
We're the flame in blustery winds
And I'm a fool to let you in.

Heart decay
Hope destroys and tears away
Set me free
You're the demon that won't let go of me

Fierce insecurities
Crippling lies
All in disguise
As I love you

Leaning far over the edge
I'm a fool to even let this begin
We're the flame in blustery winds
And I'm a fool to let you in.

Feel so dead
Can't get up, can't move on,
It's all been said.
But you knew better
Then you stabbed my deepest fears
and you watched them while they bled

Fierce insecurities
your cold siren eyes
Keeping the guise
of I love you

Leaning far over the edge
I'm a fool to even let this begin
We're the flame in blustery winds
And I'm a fool to let you in.

I can say it once and it rings true
That I am done once and for all with you
But if you chase me you know I'll turn right back
I'm not strong enough for that
I'm not strong enough for that.

Leaning far over the edge
I'm a fool to even let this begin
We're the flame in blustery winds
And I'm a fool to let you in.

We're the flame in blustery winds
And I'm a fool to let you in.
Track Name: Sunrise
Something in his eyes, it keeps me guessing
There's an answer why I've been here all this time
And it's wrapped up in this ever-burning question
Will the sun rise?

There's an ever-rushing tide that keeps me steady
Hope beyond the hope that sometimes fades away
Hiding underneath the maybe and not ready
Will he find another way?

Moving on
Towards or away
All he knows is that he'll stay
Running for the higher prize
So much more than golden beams and empty eyes
Will the sun rise?

Chains on doors and empty hearths and closed up windows
Things that he leaves behind but chase him in the dark
Shame is all but fear and calls in distance echoes
Is it all that we are?

Moving on
Towards or away
All he knows is that he'll stay
Running for the higher prize
So much more than hollow halls and lilac skies
Will the sun rise?

His father left him standing at the station
While the sky rumbled and turned to black and blue
And now it haunts him every time that it starts raining
And he doesn't understand when I say, "I will stay with you."
He doesn't understand when I say, "I will stay with you."

Moving on
Towards or away
All he knows is that he's gonna stay
Running for the higher prize
So much more than golden beams and empty eyes
So much more than hollow halls and lilac skies
So much more than what they say about you and I
So much more than questioning the sunrise.
Track Name: Sleepwalking
I can't sleep
It's hard to breathe
It's hard to say
That they were right
You're hard to keep, you wouldn't stay

But I believed in the you you showed me
I loved a man who would never owe me
So who is standing in front of me now?

I must be sleepwalking
Cause I know this can't be true
You must be sleep talking
Cause this doesn't sound like you
And there's a fine line between denial and despair
Just a fool controlled by a broken heart
Sleepwalking right into your stone cold arms.

You left a hole
I try to fill with plans and dreams
But those were you
You were supposed to be with me

But I believed in the you you showed me
I loved a man who would never owe me
So who is standing in front of me now?

I must be sleepwalking
Cause I know this can't be true
You must be sleep talking
Cause this doesn't sound like you
And there's a fine line between denial and despair
Just a fool controlled by a broken heart
Sleepwalking right into your stone cold arms.

Who are you and why does this seem like the final ending?
Where is the one that I once knew, oh were you just pretending?
Who are you and why does this seem like the final ending?
Where is the one that I once knew?

I must be sleepwalking
Cause this can't be happening
I'll say you're sleep talking
And I'll swear it's just a dream
And when I wake up it'll be like nothing's changed
And I'll act like you didn't tear me apart
Sleepwalking in denial's loving arms.
Track Name: Matters to Me
You ask me to move along
But I am weak and you are strong
You move on
You don't understand
That you're all gone
and that matters to me.

You were here and now you're not
I’m sure I should have forgotten
What I had
What I lost
How I gave my all for nothing
Can you keep our memories
Cause I'm too sad to remember
How you held me, how you held me
In December.

The summer sun cast deceit
Then when snowfall came, you left me.
The moments last til they fade away
You are in the past and that matters to me.

You were here and now you're not
I’m sure I should have forgotten
What I had
What I lost
How I gave my all for nothing
Can you keep our memories
Cause I'm too sad to remember
How you held me, how you held me
How you left me, how you left me
In December.

You're just fine
Your days roll on
But you were mine and that matters to me.
Track Name: All Around Me
It's in the past
I tell myself
But it seems to last and last and last

You are gone
I tell myself
But it seems to go on and on and on and on

The past is still resounding
Cause you won't let me mourn
Your shadow’s all around me
And I can't shake you.

I'm still here
I tell myself
But I'm just fear and fear
and fear I'm someone else

You were true
I tell myself
But what if I didn't know you, you, you

The past is still resounding
Cause you won't let me mourn
Your shadow’s all around me
And I can't shake you.

If you let go
Then I'll be free
But what is freedom
If you're not here with me

If you let go
Then I'll be free
But what is freedom
If you're not here with me

The past is still resounding
Cause you won't let me mourn
Your shadow’s all around me
And I can't shake you.
Track Name: Enough
Lay my head down
In the bed where you used to be
I can’t shake the feeling
of your hands all over me.

Too many years and too many blows
Too many shame awards to show
The doubt domination
A break in my soul
For the nights I believed you would never let go
The lies and excuses were just cover-ups
For that you didn’t love me enough
Darling, you didn’t love me enough.

Haunts my dreams, my thoughts,
My days are spent on missing you
Wasting away
Living while the ghost of you stays true.

Too many years and too many blows
Too many shame awards to show
The doubt domination
A break in my soul
For the nights I believed you would never let go
The lies and excuses were just cover-ups
For that you didn’t love me enough
Darling, you didn’t love me enough.

And you know what’s so wrong?
I shouldn’t miss you at all
Cause you made me feel worthless and weak and small
But the love of my life is the one I will always forgive.

Looking back it was wrong
You were cruel to me
But I can’t shake the feeling that we're meant to be
And my body’s grown old from all of your sin
So I can’t let you see me again
I can't let you see me again.

Too many years and too many blows
Too many shame awards to show
The doubt domination
A break in my soul
For the nights I believed you would never let go
The lies and excuses were just cover-ups
For that you didn’t love me enough
You didn’t love me enough.
My darling, you didn't think I'm enough
But darling, I swear I’m enough for you.
Track Name: Ending
Here's to the ending of the we that I knew
The end to pretending that I'd be with you
The end of the nightmare that I was used
Here's to the ending.